The last few months I witnessed what I really dream of becoming. I really think I've been witnessing what I feel like my calling is. I know deep down I am a very long way from it and I need more time and prayer to really be sure, but deep down in my hearts of hearts I crave it!
I've been watching so many women preach.... whether it's through conferences, church services or video clips.... I have been been in total awe! I am just in so much awe of these beautiful, inspirational and strong women who just want to speak the word of God and spread messages that are aimed to uplift, inspire and strengthen other women. Just watching their personalities come out and reaching to so many.... I WANT THAT!
Realistically, I am a long way from that. I still need to work through this season, serve in my church more and really work towards finding a solid bearing of who I am. But the thought that it could be a dream that I can work towards just excites me! I love talking, writing, giving, inspiring, strengthening, sharing, talking.... yep..... how awesome would it be just to make a living talking, writing, giving, inspiring, and strengthening!
Don't get me wrong, I love my job and I love teaching, but I feel like deep down I am not a teacher of children as such. For years I've tried to get out of the teaching game, but I keep finding myself back into it and I seriously wonder why (I'm still figuring it out!) Maybe I doubt myself and my life purpose is to be a High School Teacher and haven't figured that out yet. But I feel like it's a season in my life to learn to be a better teacher, grow in resilience and build a more respectful character (Oh God I hope I don't lose my job!!!!) I don't know how many years this season will be, I really don't. But I know that it's my time to embrace EVERYTHING I learn.
So ultimately I plant my 'dream seed' and leave it to God. He will place me in places and situations that may lead me to that or something else. Who knows? I'll let time be the judge of that. :-)