Just over 'half way'....
Ok so I've been doing this blog for 6 months now..... half way through the initial time I committed to myself. It's been close to 2 years since I started my initial weight loss and I've now been a single parent for about 11 months. Time really goes fast when you're not really paying attention.
The last few days I've had a few situations that have occurred where I have really started to consider where I'm at now and where I want to go in the future. What do I truly want out of my life? What am I willing to do to achieve it? Who I want to play a part in it? This thought that I'm steering closer to the business end of my 20's...... that for the first time in my entire life I feel a strength within myself I never knew I had. The feeling of certainty that I can achieve more than I ever knew I could. This passion within myself that I am willing to balance my head and heart voices and be peaceful and diplomatic in my judgements. This feeling of contentment knowing that I work to provide for my household.
Well..... what do I want? Honestly, I want what any person wants. I want peace within myself, my daughter to be safe, for the others that I hold so dear to me to be safe, to be able to provide, to love and be loved, to fall in love and create a bigger family, to travel, to keep evolving as a person, to keep testing my limitations...... to live a life of emotional contentment and fulfilment. Why would I ask for any else really? Some of those things I have now...... some are within my grasp and some are still quite far away, but I am ok with that. Because I mean..... look what I have done in two years????? Imagine what I can do in five.... or even 10 years???? I look to every reward I have now for all my hard work and the joy in knowing that others are cheering me on, and the sheer excitement of knowing that I am inspiring others to start their own little journey.
And none of it comes easy either. There are so many tears and tantrums, writing, reflecting, lessons to learn, situations to deal with, loses to accept. I still go through the motions like everyone else. I still have to deal with my emotions. I still sit down someones and mentally slap myself and go 'No Krystal.... NO Why did you just say that you idiot???!!!" I'm still learning...... but I use my lessons to my advantage in moving forwards, not falling back!
So to every person that's been so loving and supportive and provided me with the opportunities I have, THANK YOU! Thank you for your kind and loving words, your trust in faith in me to work with and for you.
Enjoy your night! :-)