Waiting.... waiting.... waiting...
Have you ever been in a season of 'waiting'? Maybe this season of waiting came from a set of values you have, or a circumstance which was out of your control, or a decision that seemed right at the time, or various circumstances lead you to a decision which has lead you into your waiting season?
Whether you have walked this season for 15 minutes or 15 years, there's a lot within yourself and your surroundings to contend with: doubt, fear, longing, questions, wonder.... just to name a few.
The story in your head continuously cycles between:
I totally have this season covered and could sing from the mountain tops.... to...
Complete indecisiveness, fear and wondering about the "what if's"... to....
Life just SUCKS today and I don't even want to leave my bed!
Maybe this season is going for a lot longer than you had hoped or maybe you feel like that decision you initially made hasn't quite gone to plan. That's the time where your STRENGTH, CHARACTER, EMOTIONAL ENDURANCE, FAITH and CAPACITY are tested and stretched beyond what you can ever comprehend. And yes, some days it totally sucks. Whether you will admit it or not, some days you probably cry or get angry and wonder why no one seems to be listening or understanding your situation. You could be reaching that point where it is all getting too much and you want to pack it all in a walk away.... or return to the toxic thing that placed you in this season to begin with. There could even be others around you receiving and enjoying the one thing you want: that relationship, promotion, job, payout, house, health, that chance to live beyond a terminal disease, the long awaited birth or a child.... they have it, but you are yet to see it come to pass in your life or some sort of relief. And yes it hurts.... a lot.
But can I offer you some encouragement today?
You might see this as a season of waiting, but it is more a season of HEALING and PREPARATION! This is a season for you to develop empathy and compassion for others and learn to listen to your intuition more. It's a season where you can open your eyes and ears to more to experiences you have ever known or understood. It's a season where you can see the world from an angle that is beyond yourself and your needs and have a chance to give something back.
You might be wondering if you made the right decision about leaving that toxic relationship or turning down that promotion or leaving that job. And ultimately it's not about whether it's the right or wrong decision, it's more about the fact that you are here right now, in THIS moment as YOU ARE and have a chance to make something good from your decision. There must have been something not right about the situation to make you walk away to begin with, so do you truly think that walking back into it is going to give you what you truly want?
I also want to encourage you that the process of 'waiting' feels like the longest time because that's when you gravitate the most attention to the issue at hand. I guarantee you that three years of the thing you want feels a lot quicker than three years of the thing you are desperately waiting for. Consider 'waiting' as an opportunity to practice patience and keeping the right and peaceful heart that you deserve. The time of waiting should be one of the most peaceful times of your life because you can seek comfort in knowing you are becoming while the anticipated outcome is coming.
So take comfort in the fact that you aren't alone, the wait isn't forever, it's a chance to heal and prepare and above all, it's up to you as to how you use this ultimately short season that you have right now.
Have a lovely day :-).