Seeing Opportunity, Happiness and Growth from Disappointment
Have you ever had a situation in your life where you were anticipating an outcome, only to be disappointed that it didn't happen or meet your expectations? The truth is it can cut deep emotionally or tap at your own 'Achilles heel'…. after all you are human! Time to deal and heal is essential, but it's also important to find a positive spark in that healing process and see the bigger picture.
I know that in my own life I have experienced enormous amounts of 'disappointments' and setbacks, but I am learning to deal and heal through them better because of how I have changed my perception of these situations. Honestly, I still cry, get impatient and angry like the next person, but I have to do everything I can to stop that from affecting the aftermath of the disappointment. Here are some things that I have learnt from dealing with disappointments:
1. Disappointment is an indication of the bar I have set for MYSELF, rather than the bar that GOD has set for me.
Whether I want to admit it or not, my influences 'condition' me to where my bar is set in the social scheme of things. Insecurity and fear of rejection has the potential to restrict my capabilities, which in turn makes me see myself below my potential. In reality, society creates these unhealthy ideals of where individuals fit in the social food chain. From there, people who are impacted fall into the trap of believing that point B is the best they can obtain and work for, when realistically they can aim for point L. Don't ever see a disappointment as failure, instead see it as a potential to catapulted towards something more amazing and incredible than you've ever imagined possible!
2. Disappointment is a lesson in motion.
NEVER walk away from a situation without learning something from it! Life is a continual lesson, and we are created to learn, grow, be influenced, influence and make our own perceptions based on various criteria. Did you learn to change your approach? Did you learn to strengthen your faith? Did you learn something new about yourself in general? Whatever it is, take it in, absorb it, reflect on it, then move on challenged and changed (even slightly!). Disappointments are meant to shift us further away from mediocrity anyway!
3. Disappointment is a reminder that it's not about you.
Do you think that maybe that situation wasn't meant for you? Maybe you are there to play a part for someone else. Use your time there to uplift and encourage others…. show grace…. wish them all the best! Real leaders and mentors will find something good in every disappointment and find any way possible to help mentor someone new.
4. Disappointment tests your faith and character.
It's so easy to get caught up in the WHY it happened, that we forget about the HOW it can STRENGTHEN us. Consider this: food needs to be broken in the body to take out the nourishment our body needs, a ground needs to broken to lay a slate in order to build a house, hair needs to be cut to grow healthier, a caterpillar needs time to be a recluse to become a butterfly. Disappointment may weaken us today, but those broken pieces will be used to make us stronger TOMORROW!
5. Disappointment makes you thankful.
Although things may not have happened the way you hoped, you still had to achieve incredible things to get to that point. Take the time to give thanks for the opportunities that been presented to you and the journey you have travelled to get there. Especially find things that are going right and be richly blessed in those. Being thankful opens your heart more to the good things that come out of a bad situation and make the healing process easier to manage.
The biggest source of encouragement to remember is that disappointment happens for your greater good. It never happens to punish you to 'give you what you deserve'.... well actually it does give you what you deserve. It provides you with an opportunity (that you deserve) to be the most amazing and inspiring person possible. It also keeps your feet on the ground and provides a reminder of where you came from so you are thankful for who you have become.